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Thanks for sharing this intimate conversation-poem here, A. Such a powerful distinction you make between happy and joyful. I relate to this deeply, as I have similar circumstances with siblings. Birthdays are grief markers for me in those relationships. Wishing you and your brother the peace that passeth all understanding.

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Thank you, Keith. I don't know that I've ever named this day as a grief marker before, but that definitely feels right. I always dread it in a way I don't really do with any other date.

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For me, the grief that has come with sibling estrangement is different, but just as hard as the grief that has come with losses from actual deaths. And it so rarely gets acknowledged in our culture. Holding much space for you around the dread. <3

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Thank you, friend ЁЯзб

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